People and nations are complicated things, to make them easier to understand people simplify and dumb them down to one or few easy to understand and use stereotypes.
Americans do this too. For example, they like to think that Mexicans are lazy, eat beans, have small curvy mustaches and wear ponchos and sombreros. Far not every Mexican match any of these stereotypes but they persist. They also provide colorful contrast with say Canadians, whom Americans like to see as very liberal and progressive. They also believe that you can get free healthcare the moment you cross the border. That is not true, but cartoons like Simpsons and Family Guy keep showing that over and over again.
Why they do it? Simple, colorful and contrasting stereotypes are entertaining and easy to remember. These stereotypes however do shape people's worldview, as some actually believe in them. As much as they are untrue, certain people do base their opinions and even decisions on them.
Fundamentally from a psychological point of view, all these stereotypes are reflection of America's own internal psyche and desires. Stereotypes about Canada reflect the country, progressive Americans wish the Unites States were. Stereotypes about Mexicans let, conservatives to think better about themselves and justify their own better quality of life compared to Mexicans.
Truth is Mexicans are not poor because they are lazier than Americans but admitting that would shatter the conservative psyche and mindset, destroy they self-justification for being better off than Mexicans. Without it they will start thinking they did not earn or deserve the lifestyle they have. That will crush their psycho and ego. It is the same for admitting that poor are poor not because they are lazy, but due to back luck and poor hand in life. So, they do not admit that and stick to their stereotypes like their life depends on it, because psychologically it does.
In the same way admitting that Canada does not give healthcare to anyone who cross the border would shatter progressive people hopes and dreams about some charitable paradise on earth that loves everyone unconditionally.
Because of that both stereotypes persist to reinforce people's psyche, mentality and worldview.
It is the same with Russia. The country is also full of various stereotypes that many people believe or choose to believe to. Just like for the US, for Russians these stereotypes reinforce the psyche and justify their believes and actions. There are few who are able to accept the truth, but majority indulge themselves in delusions instead.
Putin does indulge these delusions. In fact, pretty much everything he done ever since he became president 25 years ago was pamper to these delusions. His actions do not make any sense in the Western countries because they do not share the same delusions as Russians do. Because of that countless people wrote countless books, essays and such, trying to understand reasons behind Putin's actions. It's like when you think that some obscure traditions from a primitive tribe, like putting bones in their noses a stupid and savage but at the same time would defend your own ones no matter how strange they are like for example circumcision for Jews and Muslims.
I wrote a series of articles about stereotypes that prevail in Russia. Here is one about Europe and you can search more on my blog. In this article I will cover two countries that fit these stereotypes best, Latvia and Belarus. Because they fit stereotypes best, Putin has much easier time dealing with them than with say Ukraine that falls somewhere between the stereotypes and because of that cause conflict of understanding in average Russian's mind.
Latvia
Publicly relationship between Latvia and Russia could not be worse. Russian government accuse Latvia of violating human rights of Russophone residents, closing Russian language schools and treating them as second-class citizens. Russia further accuse Latvia of being Nazi sympathizer, honoring SS veterans and holding public parades for them, plotting genocide of local Russophones and what not.
There is some limited truth to these claims, but official Russian opinion grossly exaggerates the situation. For example, there is indeed a special non-citizen status that many Russophones have and a special passport to denote it. However, those with non-citizen status can obtain full Latvian citizenship and more than a half of the Russophones did so already.
However, this non-citizen status is symbolic, and Russian TV will not stop rave about how racist, Russophobe there Latvians are with their "Nazi apartheid" regime.
That does not prevent Russian government from equating this practice with South African apartheid and Nazi policies. Despite being so horribly oppressed, most Russophones prefer their life in Latvia even if they dislike certain policies of Latvian state. They do not want to leave Latvia and move to Russia instead, even if Russia willing to give them citizenship no questions asked.
Despite that Russian government persists with these rather groundless accusations. Why? Because this is expedient for propaganda. Many Russians tend to believe that West think of them being savage barbarians who can never be as civilized as proper Europeans are. People actually want to be in Europe but believe that Europe will not accept them as one of their own. Inferiority complex.
Putin strokes this inferiority complex for his personal needs: offended by such a scornful and humiliating rejection by Latvians on behalf of the entire Europe, upset and full of "righteous indignation" Russians will in turn their back on the West and rally behind Putin as their savior and protector. Nationalism and Putin's popularity will take a hike and his position on the top will be secure once more.
Because of that the worse Latvians treat their Russophone population, the better it is for Putin.
If Latvians instead decided to befriend Russophones and bring them into Europe, then Russians would turn to Europe. They will begin to question Putin's anti-Western ways, and he will lose power; Anti-Western nationalists would lose ground for their hatred of Europe.
Because friendship with the West would mean end of political and possibly even biological life for Putin, he is opposed to that. To stay in power Putin needs a Russophobe Western country constantly hurting Russian feelings in one of the other ways. Latvia and to some extend Estonia fulfils this role.
Latvians even "play the ball" with Putin and in turn accuse Russia of illegally invading and occupying them prior to WWII, blame them for human rights violations during Soviet times, accuse them of trying to erase Latvian language and culture, demand large reparations as compensation for the occupation as well as claiming Pytalovo (Petsamo) rayon of Pskov Oblast as rightful part of Latvia.
Latvian claims are substantiated, USSR did only/mostly bad things to Latvia, USSR deprived them of independence, send many Latvians to Siberia, flooded country with people from other parts of USSR and many more. It would be reasonable for Latvia to ask for a compensation or at least an apology. However, Russians prefer to look at it as if USSR did only/mostly good to Latvia and Latvia fails to be grateful enough for what USSR did for them.
Publicly Putin several times ridiculed these claims and absurd and preposterous and even infamously promised Latvians "ears of dead donkey" instead. Privately however he is happy that Latvians constantly stocking anti-Western sentiment in Russia but constantly hurting Russian people feelings and keep people loyal to him.
Because of that behind the doors relationship between Latvia and Russia are better than public ones. Rich Russians buy expensive properties in Riga, driving construction boom and injecting lots of money into Latvian otherwise dysfunctional economy. Latvians enrich themselves with laundering Russian money, sure they hate Russians as well, but not their money. Around half of Latvian economy is so opaquely named "unclassified transactions". They even hold annual Russian musical festival in Jurmala, just short drive away from Riga, for Rich Russians to enjoy, but away from general public, both Russophone and Latvian, who would be puzzled why two sworn enemies are hanging out in such a friendly manner.
In Russian psyche Latvia fulfils role of an evil and treacherous boogeyman who betrayed Russia like Judas betrayed Jesus. According to official Russian government interpretation of history USSR "saved" Latvia from genocide and extermination by Nazis and Latvia "thanked" Russia by siding with its enemies, treating Russians like second class citizens, and destroying Russian monuments of WWII while honoring people who collaborated with Nazis.
This boogeyman is just what Putin need to sell his anti-Western ideology to people. Without the boogeyman like that People would question if Europe and the West really as Russophobe as Putin claims they are, and Putin's rule will fall apart.
Belarus
The other extreme of this spectrum is Belarus. Belarus actually borders Latvia and even looks much like Latvia or Lithuania, but average Russian perceive them as two polar opposites. If Latvia is Russophobe hateful Nazi snob, then Belarus is Russia's best and almost only friend and brother in this cold hateful Russophobe world.
Back in Soviet times Soviet government used to portray USSR as whole and Russian people in particular as heroes who save weak and downtrodden people of the world from imperialism, capitalism, exploitation, racism, abuse and what not. Socialist countries, including Soviet Socialist Republics were portrayed as such saved countries. USSR propaganda never stopped saying how greatly all these "liberated" nations are happy that USSR saved and protected them. Many were sold to this idea of being "valiant heroes of the world" and grew attached to it, priding themselves for being "the force of good, contributing to fairness and justice in the world". Even some people outside of USSR got sold on this ideology and defected to USSR or spied for it, even if defectors to the West were much more numerous.
However, when USSR collapsed and Warsaw pact and even Soviet Socialist Republics became independent, many started openly criticizing USSR and call it occupier and oppressor. Many Russians got a psychological crisis of sorts. "Are we the bad guys, Hans?" Many could not believe it or accept it. They desperately wanted someone to refuse all these "groundless accusations" and reaffirm that they were good guys just as Soviet propaganda use to tell them.
Here where Belarus and Lukashenka came in. Back in 90s, when Russian questioned their role int the world Lukashenka helped to affirm Soviet propaganda. On Behalf of Belarus and its people, he assured Russians that they were indeed heroes USSR told them they were. His message was something like that: "Even if various ungrateful treacherous Baltics chose to forget what USSR did for them and now shit in Russia in exchange for dirty American money, Belarus is not like that. Belarus remembers what Russia did for it and will never betray Russia and will fight together with Russia against Americans and NATO to the bitter end."
That is awfully hypocritical of a country that pays for Russian gas 6 times less neighboring Lithuania. Greedy and cynical Lukashenka would not remain as loyal if gas was the same price as for Lithuania.
However Russian psyche needed someone "friendly" like Belarus and Yeltsin embraced Lukashenka to deflect from himself some of the blame for "destroying USSR" and give people something to believe in. Putin kept this special treatment of Belarus, even if more sober heads would point out that this "loyal brother" would be completely useless in case war with NATO and subsidizing him cost budged a lot of money. Lending him Russian riot police from all over the country to suppress protestors against his continuous rule is also a hassle as they are needed in Russia to prevent Russian opposition from overthrowing Putin himself.
However emotional and political cost of abandoning this "loyal brother" is too high and so Lukashenka and Belarus continue their role as Russia most loyal puppet, while using this emotional sentiment to extract various material concessions from Russia.
From Russian psychological perspective Belarus is Russia's little brother that Russia must protect because Russia is not the kind of hero who abandons family to their fate. If Russia would abandon even Belarus, many people In Russia would face psychological crisis. A lot of Russian identity is built around this concept of being hero of the oppressed and being protective older brother for Ukraine and Belarus.
Conclusion
In Russian psyche Belarus is Russia little brother whom Russia protects. In contrast Latvia is an ungrateful swine who now shits on a hero who saved them from genocide by Nazis. It's simple and convenient with these two. Russian government knows how to handle either of them and mostly happy with the role each of them play in post-Soviet reality and in keeping Putin in power.
Dealing with these two extremes is much easier for Russian government than with something that falls in between these extremes. Because Latvia is too Russophobe for anyone pro-Western in Moscow to reasonably suggest that it's something Russia should imitate. Belarus in contrast is too authoritarian and anti-western for such pro-Western people, so they do not wish to imitate it.
That is how Putin wants it to be. He does not want any countries to be democratic enough for Russian Liberals to imitate, yet at the same time not Russophobe enough for Russian patriots to hate with burning passion.
There are two extremes and an uncanny valley in the middle. Unfortunately, Georgia, Armenia, Ukraine and Moldova do fall into this uncanny valley. Because of that Putin wants each of them to move to one or the other extremes. Among them Ukraine has a peculiarly unique place in Russian psyche, I will cover it in a separate article.
Final Word
As much as many in the EU want to see Russia join the block as long as Putin is in power it is unlikely. He is too cunning and alert to simply let EU communicated to Russians directly and convince them they can easily join the EU and live in Moscow like in Milan. That will work if EU could actually reach to common Russians, but Putin is too vigilant to let EU's message reach common Russians. Because of that unless EU has a way to bypassing this deliberate information blockade, they should postpone Russia for the time being and instead focus on Eastern partnership instead.
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