How my Past Uni/Business Partnerships Work

Fedya

Even back in Russia when I used to hand out with Fedya, it was pretty much always him who would handle all sort of culture and social norms based human interactions with people around us. He somehow knew just what to say so that teachers, troublesome classmates and other people around us would leave us alone and not get offended. He could get the best outcomes from them.

At least I was not sure how do this any better. People somehow pick on me over things I could not understand. He could just shut them somehow.

Our collaboration formed somewhat ad-hoc but more or less endured.

I would talk little and only with other people of our Starcraft and metal music Just True group of friends. 

I had a few friends outside of Fedya's cycle and would talk to them at times. However, there would be many other people with whom I would not really talk at all.

Somehow Fedya managed to win my trust in his actions. May be because both of us were burdened by social and school rules and wished to dodge them as much as we could.

None of us wanted to be punished for breaking the rules. However, neither of us wanted to follow them if we could get away with it.

Ibrahim

Later in Australia, I somewhat got into a similar ad-hoc partnership with Ibrahim. He too handled all sorts of social interactions. He too knew what to say to teachers and other such people. 

He also drove me around in his car sometimes. Convenient considering my other alternatives were buses.

I would handle technical aspects of actual programming. 

These technical aspects sure were much more valuable for Ibrahim and others. They probably would not be able to do it without me. I would more or less manage without him. 

Here again shared understanding of situation. We need to do what we can to pass and graduate. We can cheat but without getting caught. Allowed us to work together.

None of us wanted to fail either by being caught with plagiarism or by simply failing to do assignments. However, neither of us cared for real integrity and such as well.

Business, that could have been.

Later it could have evolved into a business partnership where he would find some sort of clients who need some tech things done and I would do it.

Ibrahim keeps in contact with a lot of people and because of that able to find potential clients who needs something tech done and willing to pay us.

However, Song could do tech things just as good as I do and Ibrahim preferred to work with him, so business side did not get off.

Communication Issue

I somehow struggle to communicate effectively with people. Excessive communication tire me down to. I could never keep up with tempo of social interaction Ibrahim and Fedya could do.

Aside from that I somehow make all the wrong impressions on people and cannot win them over. In fact, I often stir undue hostility from people with things I say.

It is just like with that deformed potato joke about INTJ. Even if I do not call their babies deformed potato, I still manage to say something that offends them to the same degree. I am too much of an INTJ to really tell what I said this time.

Being and INTJ gives you an ability to code in Java and Assembly at expense of the ability to understand social and cultural norms.

Middleman

Because of that a some sort of culture translating middlemen business partner is needed for me to be able to get ahead in life. Someone who can put my intentions in words that will make people around me support me and get me what I want.

I think in the past and even nowadays, many businesses begun as partnerships of two or several people. Perhaps one handled technical aspect and the other one social and fundraising. 

I can do technical but not social. Someone else has to do social for me. It could be a girl too.

On Clarity of Loyalties

However, such middleman has to be clearly aligned with maximizing benefits for me with such interactions.

He cannot be like my dad for example, who instead of maximizing benefits for me tried to squeeze from me as much as possible for the benefit of others. When I complained he called me lazy.

I do not want to be called lazy for refusing to go extra mile unpaid.

In fact, my parents felt even more exploitative than Ibrahim. Ibrahim did something in return and appreciated my contribution, my dad always acted like I owe him that.

Back to a hypothetical business partner.

I cannot trust someone whose loyalties lie with broader society or something else that is not me/us personally.

Something has to convince me that they will always get the best deal possible for me.

If it is a business partnership and we share revenue, then perhaps self-interest can keep him loyal to the business interests.

For a girl it could be simple infatuation with me. Which is possibly even better.

Of course, any of that only matter if there is indeed a lucrative enough business opportunity that can make both of us really rich. Otherwise, there is no point putting effort into digging empty mine.

Another issue is that in these times it is near impossible to trust anyone enough to deal with them at all.