Relationship for Money

I have been writing a lot about what makes people attractive to each other. Many of it stir a lot of controversy, which only proves that I hit the spot. Some claimed they saw examples that contradict what I was saying, because someone was in a relationship for different reason. Exception that proves the rule I could say, but reality is that a lot of relationship are not based on love but on financial interests and the like. A guy can have a wife for money and a, secret or not, lover on the side for love. Then they have to put an appearance and pretend they love their wife even if they actually do not. So here is my article about relationship for money.

To begin with, as much as I would not want to quote Beatles on that, but money cannot buy love. They can create a relationship based on financial interest where one side buys attention and pretence from the other side for money or other material benefits, but its not love. No matter how much money one spends on such relationship, no matter how many sweet lies, affirming love, the other says both privately and publicly, none of it will ever make it true. The one who is in it for money will only stay for as long as money keep coming their way. When money stops so does the relationship, a cruel truth that sometimes becomes apparent far too late and may even led towards dramatic consequences. And even when relationship is still underway, the one who is in it for money may be physically there, but their heart and often mind certainly not, they are there with the one they truly love.

Relationship for money look a lot better on the surface than what they really are underneath. It's like clock where one only sees clockface and two, maybe three arms, but its countless cogs and gears underneath the clock face that actually make all that work. What people around them, friends, colleagues, relatives, their children and sometimes even one of the partners see is but a surface, a happy loving couple with kids. Some envy one of the partners, thinking just how they manage to get such an awesome guy/girl despite being so mid? The person in question either faintly smiles, trying to hide the truth or proudly puffs their chest, rubbing into their friends just how much better they are for having such an awesome partner. The partner too plays their part and talks and act like they love them just the way they are like in Bruno Mars songs. Idyllic...

Hardly so. Underneath all that awe and envy inspiring glitter are the real mechanics that actually make it work and a lot of them are not pretty. Think of Akio Ahtori from Revolutionary Girl Utena who got his job of School Principal for marrying owner's daughter. Money and status for faking love and family to a girl he does not really like. In fact his story illustrates the whole thing a lot better than many other media or characters. A 'price charming' of women's dreams, he is actually a devil of sorts. Most people do not like this character, but most will still go for someone like him in real life. Trophy wives and husbands are variations of this basic type. And do not forget he also has Anthy on the side.

In real life a rich guy, a president of some big company, who wants to marry out his spoiled 'princess' daughter may as well do exact the same thing and offer a prospecting husband a job of vice president at his company in exchange for marrying his daughter and playing role of loving husband for her. A sinecure fake job that pays a lot of money for his real job: pampering spoiled daughter of his benefactor. Sure its about what she wants but only to a level, its really about what her dad wants, so nothing too extreme like tying up his daughter no matter how much she wants it.

Exact details of this arrangement will be discussed behind closed doors only between the father in-law and son in-law or between two fathers from both sides. Each individual arrangement varies in exact terms and such but generally the more one side can and willing to pay, the more they can get from the other side. A very rich guy can really make his daughters life like that of a fairy tale princess. Someone with less money will have to settle for less. 

Needless to say for free this does not happen. Idea that some guy can get attracted to a boss girl in a suit because her managerial job appeals to him on emotional level, so he would save or borrow money to buy her expensive gifts and such is pure fantasy for female romance novels. In real life for every $100 spent on gifts for such a girl, a $200 is given to him by the dad in-law, $100 for gift itself and a second $100 is a renumeration for the trouble of making his daughter happy, something to spend on himself and feel it was worth the trouble. Exact amounts vary but you get the point, do not argue that someone did for a quid instead.

Since its a rather informal deal, a certain rapport between parties are needed. Both sides should be able to trust each other to play it well for it to work. Far not every two guys will be able to agree on a deal like that due to personal disagreements, personality clash and the like. Father in law might think that prospective husband does not have what it takes to care for his daughter properly and reject him. Someone too manly or strong-willed to respect his daughter is unlikely to be approved for the role. On the other side, a Potential husband too might find prospecting father in-law to be untrustworthy and either unable or unwilling to reward him sufficiently enough. Fathers doing it for their daughters so they might want to minimise the rewards the husband gets as much as possible, but that would make it a bad deal for a husband so they might refuse.

Speaking of rewards, they may include on a job sexy secretary for the future son in-law as an informal lover. A secretary he would actually find attractive and would fuck every day instead of actually working. Well his real job begins when he gets home, to pamper his spoiled wife and take care of domestic things. See Beth from Rick and Morty for an example, she literary said that family is her job and she is currently working when her husband asked her what she feels about him. Thus when he goes to his nominal sinecure job, its to rest and have fun instead. A sexy secretary can be replaced with a submissive Thai prostitute instead. Each arrangement is different after all. Aside from a lover, money they pay should be enough for various hobbles, booze and other ways to have fun.

Once again each such arrangement is different so even if you seen some Joe Shmo did this for a brass razoo and a pack of chewing gum, it does not mean a Joe Shmo of your choice will do it for the same amount. This is already an irregular arrangement so instead of rules that govern it like minimum wage, penalty rates and awards, there are informal deals that vary and can sometimes include some unusual exchanges.

And do not forget, that changes in socio-financial situation can topple this whole house of cards complex backroom deals. Rich dad losing his money somehow or any other complications and the paid husband is over. While women do mix business and relationship, most men tend to not. So, while some gold digging wives may actually stay, a guy would certainly not. For him is purely about money and if money stopped so does the relationship. Of course a lot of drama ensured, a relationship where one is in it for emotions and another one is for money, is bound to be full of misunderstanding and frustration. If you paid for electricity for 10 years and suddenly stopped, eventually an electrician will come to disconnect your property. You would look mad if you tell him something like "we were happy for 10 years together, how could you abandon me now?" Yet in for money relationship such emotional ploys are commonplace, regardless of which the outcome will be the same. Things can go sour very fast.

Many of these arrangements are sort of half-half situations, where guy a least somewhat likes his bride or wants family/children so father-in-law need only to somewhat sweeten the deal to make it work. The same will not work if the potential husband is completely indifferent or actually dislikes his prospective wife as more rewards are needed to win someone like that over. In some cases it can be completely impossible as what prospective husband wants/asks either too much or unacceptably a lot for a potential husband-in-law.

Finally can money glue together a couple where one actively dislikes the other partner. That is not low key dislikes (mid, meh), but hating with passion everything about them. I would say no. Fundamentally strong hatred would lead towards attempts to either minimise the contact with the partner or get rid of them completely, via poison, freak accident and such. Ultimately it is unsafe for both parties as things can go very ugly.

Its the same with deals where husband was somehow coerced into a relationship. If he does not feel he is getting enough he can always turn from loving and caring husband into cold, uncaring wife beater. The above mentioned poisoning or accident is also possible. Things could go sour if the guy was too young when he signed up for the deal and father in-law managed to sign him up for cheap. Such too good to be true deal will likely turn sour when husband will realize he is not getting enough and that might either get to ugly re-negotiation or ugly family spat.

A deal like this can leave woman completely oblivious towards real feelings her husband has about her. Some might suspect that he is cheating or lying when he says he loves her, but few would really understand what really is going on or what her daddy did and paid to make it all happen. That is why marriages like these end when father in law dies and there is no one to uphold his side of the deal and provide husband with his due rewards.

Theoretically a woman can negotiate her own deal with a potential husband, but few women really understand men enough to be able to do so. Since women do not values money as much as men do, most would instead will try various non-material things to win guy of their choice. Absolute majority of such efforts will not move him an inch and a fair quarter will make him hate her instead of falling in love with her.

A reverse of this arrangement when a guy pays for a woman, hoping to win her with gifts. It also often ends up in disappointment. Women typically do not see such gifts as essentially attempt to buy her with money and often reject the guy in the end by sating she only sees him as a friend. A lot of guys later lament over wasting so much time and money for nothing. That said it still works more often for guys rather then above-mentioned solo efforts for girls.

And a final note, money can buy relationships, but it cannot buy love. Guys will always look for soft sweet, cute little thing just as girls always look for gregarious muscular chads. There are exceptions, but they only confirm the rule. Even gay men who prefer other men instead of women, actually prefer these men to be soft sweet cute and little rather than big and macho. For women its either moe or forever alone. Everything else it a lie.